Unbelievable as it may seem, conflict in relationships is sometimes healthy. While the term conflict generally is associated with negative encounters, conflict itself is neither inherently good nor inherently bad. Strengthens Collaborative Skills. A possible reason for its bad reputation is that conflicts are often poorly managed and handled in painful ways. Conflicts can lead to profound consequences, both in individual and political contexts. Conflicts in relationships begin for many reasons. Consider these benefits: The key to any successful conflict resolution is the ability to listen. The reason behind this is the activation of the fight-or-flight response when faced with a conflict. “Couples relationships —as all human relationships—are complex and operate at multiple levels with potentially dozens of choice points at any given moment in time,” noted Robert Solley, Ph.D, a San Francisco clinical psychologist specializing in couples therapy. Post was not sent - check your email addresses! Conflict refers to differences in ideas, views, plans, motives, values, and many other things. Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. Photo by klasspieter, available under a Creative Commons attribution license. Under appropriate conditions, conflict can provide important benefits. Unbelievable as it may seem, conflict in relationships is sometimes healthy. Fully listening to your partner without building a case in your head of how your partner is wrong, said Batshaw, also author of the forthcoming Things You Need to Know Before Getting Married: The Essential Guide to a Successful Marriage. In fact, engaging in conflict can have positive effects on relationships and organizations. Conflict competence is the ability to develop and use cognitive, emotional, and behavioral skills that enhance productive outcomes of conflict while reducing the likelihood of escalation or harm. I prefer the word “managing” over “resolving” conflicts. Stimulation of curiosity, interest, and information search. The difference between conflict being positive or harmful to our relationship often lies in each party's behavior during conflict, and each party's management of conflict. March 21, 2013, Erwin Z, Comments Off on Benefits of conflict. It can also generate creative solutions to problems and help people grow. “By listening to each other’s concerns and each trying to be responsive, they came up with a whole new set of solutions,” Heitler said. Sometimes, there were no spots outside. The most successful teams involve a diversity of backgrounds and approaches. Learn more about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. “The atmosphere has to stay emotionally safe enough so that both people can put out each of their ideas/feelings/experience about the conflict and then they can have a respectful conversation about it without attachment to who is right or who is wrong,” according to Solley. 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